Ruby's Birth Story

 A week before Ruby’s due date, I posted on social media that this had been my easiest pregnancy yet and I was hopeful we were going to carry that all the way through delivery. I delivered her two days later, and sure enough – our third baby ended us on a high note!

Fisher’s birth was exactly two hours and 40 minutes from start to finish, so both my first OB and then my second OB (my first one moved in the middle of my pregnancy) offered us an elective induction at 39 weeks. This was very, VERY tempting. So tempting, in fact, that at my 37-week appointment I said I wanted to move forward with scheduling it. The thought of being able to have my big kids squared away, plan my last day of work, and just know when my baby was coming was so alluring. But pretty much the moment I agreed to it, I got cold feet. By the time my 38-week appointment rolled around, we had changed our minds completely. My first two births were straightforward and uncomplicated (and both my kids came at 39 weeks and change), so it felt like we were overly trying to control something that didn’t need to be controlled. ANYWAY….

When I went to my 38-week appointment, my doctor checked my cervix and said I was about 3cm dilated. She did a tiny membrane sweep and sent me on my way, predicting that our baby would be here before the weekend was out (this was a Wednesday). The weekend came and went – and no baby.

My 39-week appointment was initially scheduled for Friday, 10/29. Earlier that week, the office called and asked if I could come in on Thursday instead. I jumped at this, knowing that a Friday visit would mean bringing Fisher with me. After my 38-week visit, I had made the decision that Wednesday, 10/27 would be my last day of work. I figured I was on a short timeline anyway, and I pretty much had all of my work ducks in a row. Physically, I felt great, but mentally, I knew I was toast.

I am so, so grateful my appointment was bumped one day earlier, because after expressing disbelief that I was still pregnant, my doctor checked me and said, “Ummm, you’re 6… no, more like 7cm dilated. Do you want to just go on over to the birth center and have a baby?” Friends, this is my third baby. And my previous delivery was unmedicated. So I know what contractions feel like. And I can tell you with utmost sincerity that, at worst, I was feeling maybe occasional tightness and that was about it. I had been having Braxton Hicks forever and a day, so nothing out of the ordinary was coming up on my radar. This is the conversation we had after that:

Me: “What time is it right now?”

My doctor: “About 10:15.”

Me: “Hmmm. Ok. Well, my son has a Halloween parade at his preschool at 11. Do you think I have time to go home, pack my kids’ stuff, go to the parade, and then get him where he needs to go…. and THEN go to the birth center?”

My doctor: “I mean, maybe – anything is possible. You could be totally fine, or your water could break at any moment and everything could change.” (Side note – Jake and I had agreed that I would not stall this time – because of what happened last time. Clearly, I have learned nothing.)

So I did exactly that. I left the office, called Jake and called my mom, went home and packed the kids’ bag. Then I went to preschool, watched the parade, explained to Fisher what was happening, met Jake at the house and we walked Fisher next door to my mom’s. It was SO dreamy that this was happening on a Thursday, since the kids go to my parents’ house afterschool every Tuesday and Thursday. Jake and I grabbed a few last minute things and chatted about how nice it was to calmly drive to the hospital – a far cry from our last hospital car ride, when he was speeding and I was screaming. 

We finally strolled in to the birth center around 12:30pm, where I’m thinking we’re going to go into triage. “We’ve been waiting for you!” they said. “We’ve got a room ready – when we hear someone is at a 7, we’re ready for go time.” I really can’t overstate this enough, if my doctor had not checked my cervix, I would not have had a clue I was in labor. I tell the nurse I’m not in any pain, but she reminds me that by the time I am in pain, it’s probably going to be too late for an epidural (boy do I know this). So we get the epidural ordered and the IV going. In walks the doctor and a resident, who checks me and says I’m complete. The nurses are staring at me in disbelief, because I’m talking and laughing normally. But you can tell just by looking at the monitor that I am contracting only very sporadically (every 4-7 minutes) and they aren’t much to speak of. My cervix, apparently, has been down this road before and is just doing whatever it wants. At this point, my nurse asks me if we plan to have any more children after this. I assure her that this is the last one. “Well,“ she says, “if you decide to have any more, you should be prepared for the very real possibility that you may have that baby at home or in your car.” Noted. I'm so glad this is our last one.

So my IV is going, the anesthesiologist comes in and gets the epidural in (this was the most painful part of the whole dang thing. When I had an epidural with Lyla, I was in very active labor and did not even notice it go in. I very much noticed this time. Ouch.) It’s now about 2:30pm and the resident and doctor come back in and break my water… and nothing much happens. They re-check me and realize that I’m actually about 8cm dilated; my bag of waters had been pushing on my cervix, making it seem like I was more dilated than I actually was. (Still – being at 8cm without pain didn’t have me complaining at all!) I was still contracting fairly slow and I could feel that baby was still really high. So they started Pitocin and grabbed a peanut ball to wedge between my knees. Around 4:20pm, I tell Jake I can feel pressure and he should probably grab the nurse; she was already at the door and planning to check on me. She peeks under the sheet and says, “Yep, baby’s head is right there. We’re probably going to pull your legs back and baby will be here.” Sure enough, everyone rushed back in, I gave about 3 pushes and she was here! This was the least pain (read: zero pain) I had ever felt during a delivery, so I actually felt present enough to look down and pay attention. The first thing I noticed was her head full of hair! I was the one to call out that she was a girl – which was so, so special. This was our first pregnancy not finding out the sex ahead of time and I can’t recommend it highly enough. It made her birth so exciting (in fact, I was not pushing very effectively, because I couldn’t stop smiling and crying in anticipation of her arrival).

Ruby Mae joined us at 4:33pm on Thursday, October 28 (just barely missing a 27^th birthday like her big sibs!). She was our smallest baby yet at 8 pounds, 6.4 ounces and 20.5 inches long. (I know this is not small - just small for us. Ha.) It was so absurdly easy and low-key; I can still barely believe it. We had the name Ruby on our short list ever since Lyla was born 7 years ago, and we still loved the name so much. After she was born and we had shared her name, I found out my great grandmother's middle name was May - so it was meant to be!

This sweet girl has completed our family and we couldn’t be happier (or more exhausted). J

*Dear reader, if you're reading this and thinking this is the most obnoxious birth story you’ve ever read, please note that I gave birth to my second child with exactly zero drugs and he weighed 10 pounds, 5 ounces – so I’ve been there!